I've written & rewritten this in my head so many times that I'm just gnna write it.. hope this is ok..
My names Rach I've been with TQ since lockdown 1.0 & I've hopped on & off the Venga bus ever since!
About a year ago I started experiencing really bad bloating it would last most of the month & id be lucky if I fit into 'that' pair of skinny jeans for 3-4 days of the month, the rest of the time I'd be in baggy clothes & my other half's hoodie. I developed a really bad relationship with food & somewhere along the line thought 5 spin classes a week with a side of more cardio & not much else would be the cure for the constant bloating . (it wasn't)
Then I developed pain in my lower abdomen & my self confidence had gotten so bad I couldn't be intimate with my other half & when I could be it began to hurt.
Somewhere along the line I think all of Maeves positive statements began to sink in and I realised I needed to locate my big girl pants & go seek help.
After a few investigations ( gotta say girls, the gyno teams are lovely 💜 & not quite as scary as I imagined them to be) it turns out they found something on my womb, & whilst it's not the cure it has started new lines of investigation into endometriosis and other things I can't spell or pronounce 🤪..
I've been so worried & scared that I wasn't normal or that because I was feeling how I was that I wasn't feminine or good enough.. I was really harsh to myself!
However, luckily Ive to the conclusion that's it's ok not to be ok!
That just because I was having feminine issues didn't / doesn't make me less of a woman.
The more I read online, the more people I found on Instagram who spoke out about feminine issues & I know maeves always real with us about the bloat & girl talk, but I think sometimes there is still a stigma surrounding talk about vaginal concerns or issues..
I searched the chat rooms for someone else who might be feeling this way but I couldn't see anything so I thought I'd brave it & start one.. so if only one of you queens reads this - Thank you!
My January challenge whilst I want to get fit & stronger it's also to remember that whilst I might not be feeling 100% all of the time, I still made the time, I threw several punches in combat queens or lifted those weights in S7's - because I am enough.
To any queens going through any of the above or have been or if you've got a friend of a friend who has, advice is always welcome & anything is better than the dreaded lying awake at 1:00am worrying google search!
Rach xx
p.s Thanks for reading I know it was a long one! 🥰
